There are many things I should be doing other than this, the night before the final and with many preparations yet to do for moving out, leaving Osaka behind, and traveling 18 days, mostly on my own.
But hilarious thing- you know the pop-up ads that say you've won an iPod? Or a bunch of money, if you can only answer the question right?
Japanese ones offer the chance to win a GREENCARD to America, if only you can correctly identify the president.
I've been busy enough that I've had a continual backlog of cool things I've wanted to write that haven't been happening. So, before I lose it all:
~After Pokemon Center Osaka, Ely and I explored some more of the Umeda district. As she's interested in paranormal activity, she got really excited when we walked by one of the attractions in the HEP 5 shopping center, "The Room of Living Dolls". They seat a group of people in a small room full of creepy dolls, give you headphones with incredibly sophisticated surround sound, and let the lights and sounds and screw with your mind. I left totally freaked out by hearing the deranged mother whisper in my ear and kill the person sitting two seats away and shove my chair and then the creepy daughter doll tried to steal my eyes as the snip snip sound of scissors drew close; Ely was totally unphased by it. I don't understand that girl.
HEP 5- it's a landmark because it has a red ferris wheel on top. Obviously.
~I'm an ass in Starbucks. Since my sister works in the very first Starbucks in Seattle, I like to take pictures of international shops for her and check out how they're different. So, I tried to enter as any normal American would do. I did not notice the queue of waiting customers waiting for tables to be cleared so they would be allowed, nor did I notice their glares as I jovially strolled past them. I didn't understand why an employee intercepted me before I could even approach the counter to ask "sit-in or take-out"; the roundabout, non-confrontational Japanese way of saying "look, there's a line and you need to be in it, dummy".
~Played a 100円 game of pachinko. It's like a slot machine, except instead of "controlling" when you spin the reels, the reels are controlled by little marbles randomly falling through a shiny, Plinko style machine into the target. Your influence is limited to deciding the rate of how fast the marbles fall. Don't quite get the appeal.
~Unexpected faux pas- there's an excessively, hilariously polite expression I use sometimes jokingly use to brush off compliments or convince the other person I'm good at Japanese: お褒めごとを預かって,恐縮です (Literally, "I am shrinking in fear from having received your honorable words of praise)。Last weekend I visited a New Half Bar to conduct informal interviews for my research project. When I entered, I was the only customer there- the employees were a little surprised that I looked so... not a transvestite. We chatted for a while, and when the barmaster (mistress?) mentioned that I looked straight, I chuckled and thanked them in that over-the-top manner for affirming my normal masculinity. The bartender kind of muttered "I don't know that that was a compliment..." Oops. Maybe that wasn't the best audience to be affirming a standard definition of masculinity and passing as the desirable alternative.
~Surprisingly interesting topic: bathroom decor. I can't really think of any establishments in the US that strayed from the decorative style that the whole place had, but a number of Japanese places have had some things that stand out. A noodle shop in the Umeda district has political candidates for the Reform Party, watching you urinate. (SO UNCOMFORTABLE): My favorite bar, Bacchus, features a much younger and much less clothed vanity shot of the owner, Chanho-san: Lady Gaga's favorite bar, Frenzy, has... stuff?: The aforementioned transvestite bar has... Super Sayans?
~The way japanese "news" programs misappropriate clips of western music continues to confuse me. Last summer, the best examples were going straight from clips of baseball highlights set to the Toad's-tastic "Living on a Prayer", to graphs of the economic depression set to ABBA's "Money Money Money". I just recently saw a clip on the recent corruption scandals between sumo wrestlers and the yakuza--a single segment included 10 second clips of Franz Ferdinand's "Take Me Out", the score from Band of Brothers, and then Boys Like Girls "Love Drunk". Is there some deeper symbolism I'm missing here?
~AN ALL YOU CAN EAT GELATO BUFFET. Followed by Taiko Drum Master, and a quick visit to my favorite bar before coming home early to rest up for tomorrow's trip to Spa World, a multi-story complex of Onsen baths and waterparks. At the bar, I was able to tell a dirty joke that successfully converted the topic of conversation to the clitoris for the next twenty minutes. I'm pretty pleased with myself. Elly is pretty happy about gelato.
Gabe and Bowen learn the joy of Taiko Drum Master. Although according to the game's scoring system, they're more like mid-rank journeyman, and I am the master.
~Lady Gaga is everywhere. After she performed in Osaka last year, Lady Gaga came in disguise to this one bar I ended up at a couple weeks ago with some new friends, FrenZ, with her entourage, and sang karaoke of her own songs, so people eventually figured out it was her. The bartender showed me pictures of where she jumped on the table to perform Just Dance- I was sitting at the exact same spot. And then, the bartender pulled out the bar's greatest treasure- the lipstick Lady Gaga dropped and left behind. He told us to be careful with it as it contained "Precious DNA". I touched something that Lady Gaga touched! I am blessed.
I went to the Cushing Center at the Med School Library yesterday and it was beautiful and glorious. If you didn't know, Harvey Cushing was a badass who went to Yale, then hahvahd Med, travelled, did research at Yale, and revolutionized neurology or something like that. He documented every damn thing, and left it all to Yale.
I walked down there, and it's a cool room with a bunch of brain specimens. There's a video of brain surgery. Stories from Cushing's life. A shitton of brain sketches. BRAAAAIINZZZZ.
Basically, I think that the band should do a field trip. Halloween sketchfest anyone?
I found Greeno! After spending last summer in the same country and narrowly avoiding ever crossing paths with him (by literally about 50 feet) . We went to the world famous Osaka Aquarium (largest in the world!) and saw things as adorable as little claw river otters (their claws! SO TINY!) and as gargantuan as whale sharks.
My life in New Haven this summer = work all day + watch Scrubs + hang out. It's super exciting, I know. So, I've been waiting to have something more eventful to tell you all about, and here it is: my marriage proposal.
Today, as I was walking past the Green in a rush, I got stopped at a light because I like doing that thing where I don't die. And there was a guy at a hotdog cart who started talking to me (I shit you not, he said: "You're working those Calvin Kleins") and ignoring the fact that I was clearly in a rush and uninterested in conversation. He said something about the heat, and how people are complaining about it, blah blah blah, and I responded something to the effect of "Psh, I'm from Georgia, this isn't hot."
"Oh," he replied. "You're from Georgia? That means you're a Georgia Peach." Points for creativity?
And I smiled half-heartedly and silently continued begging the light to turn red so I could cross the street.
He asked what I was doing in New Haven, and I said I go to Yale. I was hoping New Haven people hate Yalies enough for him to lose interest. Then he asked if I was married. When I said no, he promptly introduced himself and invited me to come back to visit his cart sometime, because he thinks he'd like to move to Georgia one day.
Don't worry, the Members of are invited to the wedding.
